A little over seven months ago, after discovering an unruptured aneurysm, I underwent brain surgery—a decision that carried with it a mix of fear, hope, and uncertainty. My sister passed away from a ruptured brain aneurysm nearly seven years ago.
Since then, so many people have asked me how I’m feeling and doing, which has been amazing. I appreciate everyone’s concern and support. That is why I’m writing this blog.
Physically
After surgery and for months following, I had persistent pressure encasing my head like a vice, accompanied by sudden, sharp pangs of pain that caught me off guard. These sensations remind me of the battle my body was still fighting. Thankfully, I went to a headache doctor who gave me a script for some migraine meds that seemed to be helping. I’m now taking Emgality and Nurtec for migraines.
In addition, I still have bouts of fatigue that envelop me, a deep and unyielding tiredness. It’s a type of exhaustion that feels bone-deep, affecting my physical body and spirit. Sometimes during the day, I have found a 15-minute nap does the trick and helps me feel better.
Coupled with this fatigue are moments of dizziness, brief yet jarring episodes that occur with a change in position or sometimes even when I’m standing perfectly still. These symptoms, though fleeting, sow seeds of caution in my every movement. I’m afraid I’ll catch myself off balance and have a fall. But I’m trying to ignore and just move forward with my life.
Reclaiming Normalcy
In an effort to reclaim some sense of normalcy, I’ve continued my training and workouts, pushing through the discomfort and fatigue. Working has also been a priority, a way to distract myself and feel productive.
Sometimes I Feel Isolated
Perhaps the most challenging aspect of this journey has been the feeling of isolation. To the outside observer, I may appear to be fully healed, adjusting, and moving forward.
Internally, however, the experience is vastly different. It’s difficult to articulate the complexity of emotions and sensations that accompany brain surgery recovery. Friends and family, though supportive, can’t fully grasp the depth of the struggle, leaving me feeling misunderstood and alone.
And although I feel that way, I keep thinking about my sister. I keep thinking about how much she has already missed and how happy she would be seeing her second daughter married and her first daughter a mother of four children. I’ve been thinking about her even more as my daughter is approaching delivery of her first child.
An Event in September
Since I have felt so much love and support from The Bee Foundation, I decided to host a run, run/walk, and walk at Heckscher Park on September 14 at 8 am to benefit The Bee Foundation for Aneurysm Awareness. Please consider joining us by following the link here: https://www.classy.org/event/lori-weiss-memorial-run-walk/e582340
And then there’s more…
Just when I think this may be behind me, I realize that my knee isn’t holding up and recently, after an MRI found that it needs a partial knee replacement. However, if I do that, I cannot run. There is a new technology that the FDA recently approved called the Misha Unit, which I plan on doing. I’m not ready to give up running!
It’s always something but it’s the way you look at life that is the point. I’m not giving up. I’m going full steam ahead!
Are you experiencing this?
To others walking a similar path, know that you are not alone. Our journeys may be personal and unique, but they are also connected by shared experiences of resilience and hope. It’s okay to acknowledge the struggle, to feel overwhelmed, and to seek support. Remember, healing is not just about the physical scars; it’s about nurturing our minds and spirits, allowing ourselves the space and grace to recover at our own pace.
As I continue on this path, I am reminded of the strength and courage that lie within. This journey is far from easy, but it is also filled with moments of profound growth and transformation. I am grateful that I found an amazing surgeon at Mt Sinai and also grateful to have the support of The Bee Foundaiton for Aneurysm Awareness. They have been incredible.
In sharing my story, I hope to offer solace to those who feel isolated in their recovery, to build a bridge of understanding, and to remind us all that even in our darkest moments, we are never truly alone.
